Bon Voyage….   2 comments

So, further to Monday’s surprise crisis, and my Facebook post at 3-something in the morning, I had to go down to the hospital today and sign an affidavit, unfortunately, to involuntarily commit her. I wouldn’t have done so had the psych evaluator not told me she was accusing me of having raped and tried to kill her. So, I schlepped my tired ass down to the hospital on about 15 minutes’ notice and swore out an affidavit for Superior Court, and they’re holding her for 72 hours pending (usually) an in-hospital court hearing.

I go to the check-in desk at the hospital, and ask for the person I’d spoken to on the phone, I have a seat across the hallway, and I hear a guy asking for her, so  I go up to introduce myself, and he did the same. Turns out he’s the former boyfriend who, she’d told me, raped her at least five times and he regularly made her go through some ridiculous choreographed sex fantasy or he couldn’t get off.

Why he was there, I have no idea, but I said, “Oh, she told me you raped her five times. She’s only accusing me of raping her once. Think we can split a public defender?” Blank stare. Some people have no sense of humor.

I walk the 200 yards to and from the psych holding area, and sit back down in the waiting lounge. I fill out the affidavit that she went apeshit crazy and had struck me six times and brandished my own crutch at me like it was a bayonet, and the mental health evaluator came out and sat down next to me, and I showed her about ten minutes of video, which I may or may not post here at some time in the near future. For now, it’s evidence.

So, what started out to be a good deed — a service to an ex-friend whose entire flock of lifelong friends had refused to help her in any way — and I end up with 180 pounds of creepy-ass cracker bitch punching me in the ankle, hitting me in the nards, and ramming into my knee like she was LT and I was Joe Theismann. And on top of all that, she falsely accuses me of rape and attempted murder!!!

I go back in after the mental health evaluator sees the video and takes my statement, and I asked her if said delusional beast would agree to see me for a couple of minutes, which I said was kinda odd for someone who’d just been raped and nearly killed, but we all know this cracker is crackers, and she didn’t disappoint. I went in and sat down across the hall from her, and asked her why she accused me of two Class A Felonies, when I was the only one who gave enough of a shit about her fat white ass to offer her 1. a ride to Bellingham to see her shrink today (turns out no appointment  – she talked into his voicemail and acted like she was confirming an appointment. In reality, she hadn’t seen him in over a year); 2. a place to sleep for the night; and 3. relief from her own mother, a nut case in her own right and a major trigger point for her daughter.

So I’m sitting across from her in the hall, and she said, “The firemen (EMTs) said you were going to charge me with assault and wanted to involuntarily commit me.”

“And THAT’s why you accused me of rapiing you and trying to kill you?” I was trying to keep my cool. “Guys have served forty fucking years after being falsely accused of stuff like that. Who says that kind of shit???”

“Well,” and she cocks her head and does what I call the by-polar blink – eyes rolled up, all that. “they said you were going to come down here and sign some papers and something about court.”

“Look you,” I said to her through my clenched teeth, because I didn’t want to show any kind of anger to the hospital people OR their security cameras, “your own goddamn mother wouldn’t get off her ass to help you, and I did, even though we haven’t spoken in months. And as thanks for that, you go on a delusional rage and ram into the fucking knee replacement I’ve been waiting half a fucking lifetime for!!? (I was getting real close to losing it.) You’re goddamn right I did, but I wasn’t going to until you accused me of everything in the book. Why don’t you let them give you a cervical exam or do a rape kit? You fucking liar!

“I just signed a court document that says you physically attacked me, and that’s why I called 911. Oh, and I also gave them ten minutes of video that proves it. So, lose my number and don’t ever fucking call or text me again or I will have you charged with stalking.”

And then I walked out into the clean, crisp autumn air of The Free State of Washington, drove home, and lit up a joint to help me chill.

Did anyone ever pay your kindness back with a flaming bag of dogshit in front of your door? Please comment if the spirit moves you, and follow me on Facebook if you really want some laughs.


2 responses to “Bon Voyage….

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  1. Dear, Dear Warren,

    1- Thank you for trying
    2- it ain’t your bad, as you know. I’m just so sorry this happened. Folks like this are truly mental and I hope you won’t judge all based on this one. Because if you choose to ever help another, I pray your efforts receive a better form of gratitude. I haven’t read all the posts but I am very glad you had her committed. The county Sheriff’s once told me to have Mark admitted for evaluation or the next time they were going to take him in for evaluation. I hesitated…that really can screw up someone’s life and I had to decide if I wanted that on my karma tally, you know? The next day, he vamoosed out of NC to CO so he escaped, only to do worse, sicker stuff to me in CO. BRAVO! She needs things you cannot provide. Now, about your knee? Are you okay? And I’m glad you had the stuff to smoke to help with the pain. Geepers, Mister. I send you hugs and good thoughts and gratitude. As a woman that has needed help in the past, thank you for trying.


    • Thanks so much for your comment, Lynda. As for the minor injuries — ankle is a little and sore (she punched me four times), my knee hurt all day yesterday, and it hurts this morning too. I’ve got physical therapy in a little while so I’ll see if her assault on my kneecap did anything. She didn’t get me too hard in the privates, but I seemed to see (on the video) her grab the fabric of my sweatpants, so I might have got off lucky there. The swat could have been a grab attempt, and if she did something like that, I would have had her arrested on assault charges and THEN committed.

      I think I did the best thing I could have in the situation: tried to placate her, asked & ordered her to drop the crutch, and when she continued with her tirade, I called 911, which can be heard clearly on the video.

      The worst that happened to her was that she drank from my cats’ water bowl twice, dipping her hand in and sucking it in. If she turns up with an e-coli infection, well, that’s all good and fine with me. The contents of a cat’s water bowl are enough to kill a person: cats use litterboxes, and they use their paws to cover their urine & excrement. Then they put those same little paddy-paws into the water bowl, and so it can be deadly to humans. She turned feral on me, what can I tell you? Talk about someone overstaying their welcome!


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